This is, of course, an homage to Samantha Bee's News I'd Like to F*ck:

So, who do you favor?  Below is a list of pundits who have been on air during the campaign, so the late, Tim Russert is included.

In the comments, you can explain why.

Also, I would like to hear from some furriners about non-American pundit hotties.

Following Hillary Clinton's solid performance in her speech last night, the Washington Association of News for Keeping Excessive Reporting (WANKER) has issued an emergency request for donations to its research department.

In their statement, spokesman Claude Badley said that without a phony controversy that paints the Democratic party in a bad light, many pundits are unable to make comments on politics.

Katie Couric has already been observed interviewing a lady whose Chihuahua can play the bag pipes, for example.

It's not the speakers, and I tuned in yesterday because I felt that everyone should watch Kennedy, but I just can't watch them any more.

It's not that they are scripted, so is your average cooking show.

It's the talking heads.  I watch for 2 minutes, then I have to mute it....and 15 minutes after that, they show a speaker, and I un-mute it, and some talking head cuts in with something I heard before I muted it in the first place.

It drives me bug fuck, so I watch a cooking show, and read live blogging.

Even the good guys, Cafferty, Maddow, etc. drive me crazy...They talk too much and say the same stuff over and over again.....

I'd rather listen to Vogon poetry.

And perhaps the second funniest thing ever posted to the internet, is here.

Basically, it is a phony news story suggesting the Barack Obama campaign was a 300 million dollar exercise in RickRolling.

What makes this funny is that you can imaging Barack Obama actually knowing what Rickrolling is, as opposed to McCain, where the humor ends with, "Hey, you kids!  Get offa my lawn!!"

OK, so I'm listening to CSPAN's Washington Journal, and they are asking viewers to call in about possible suggestions for Secretary of State.

It's a really, really stupid topic, and I get to thinking about the Obama cabinet, and it hits me, there should be a staff level position for the promotion of music....As in make music, not war.

Then the question is, who should it be, and it hits me:  Mike Nesmith.

(Yes, I know it's an old pic, but that shirt just screams out, "Post me on the innertubes!")
In addition to being an accomplished musician, he is pretty much the father of the rock video (he turned down an offer to run MTV when it was founded and won the first Grammy Award (1981) given for Video of the Year for his hour-long Elephant Parts.), and in the event of a coverup being required, he has the liquid paper, as his mom invented the stuff.

We need a candidate who is thoughtful, believable, intelligent, telegenic, and has great hair.

George Clooney.

Seriously (not seriously, see the snark tag)

Really seriously, I would like to see Wes Clark actually selected, if just to say "fuck you" to the beltway boneheads...or Howard Dean, because...He's Howard Dean.

Biden gives me shingles, and I don't think that medical science has a name for what Bayh gives me.

Your silly VP suggestions below.

Let's be clear, that's the only thing that McCain has to run on.

His military career (4th from the bottom of the class, crashed 3x in training, etc) is not much to speak of, his entry into politics (dumped wife and married heiress), his legislative career (Keating 5 and flip flops), and his position with regard to Bush (that picture of him hugging Bush).

So, now we learn that he and his people could have gotten the questions ahead of time at Rick Warren's forum, and what is the response of a campaign spokesman?

The insinuation from the Obama campaign that John McCain, a former prisoner of war, cheated is outrageous.

This provides an opening.

Criticizing McCain over his constant use of his POW status would be lambasted by the beltway blowhards™, but criticising his campaign over its use of his POW status, with some sort of perfunctory statement that we all know how much McCain hates to bring it up, can achieve the same purpose.

Damning with faint praise.

We've all heard about McCain's new ad, Hot Chicks Dig Obama, and speaking on behalf of balding overweight guys everywhere, I'm offended.

I think that the McCain ad is being offensively sizeist, an hairist, which is different from heiress, who he married to start his political career.

I say a bunch of us show up to a McCain campaign, and take off our shirts and gyrate in protest.

Truth is, while bald on my scalp, I have plenty of hair...on my back, my chest, on my ass, growing out of my nose, and growing out of of my ears.

Bernann McKinney sells her home to pay thousands of dollars to a Korean lab to clone her dog Booger.

It hits the news, and people realize that Bernann McKinney is Joyce Mckinney, who has a very bizarre past:

.... Joyce McKinney was the former Miss Wyoming who was accused in 1977 of stalking Kirk Anderson, young Mormon Missionary, all the way from Utah to Ewell in Surrey, before kidnapping him and spiriting him away to a cottage in Dorset. There, she allegedly chained him to a bed and forced herself upon him - three times - while wearing a see-through negligee. (Her, not him. He was apparently wearing a Mormon chastity garment, and presumably a pained expression.)

The object of Joyce McKinney’s affections eventually escaped her mink-lined handcuffs. She and an accomplice were charged with kidnapping, but she insisted it was consensual. Joyce escaped the UK using a false passport and disguised as a member of a mime troupe.....

Seriously, there had to be some serious drug use on the part of the Universe.

How do we conduct an intervention?

Is there any way we can trade this guy to the Republicans?

This guy is technically an Obama supporter like Joe Lieberman is a Democrat.

Because, in talking to Politico, he just:

• Explicitly called the American people racist, "A big piece of this, of course, is whether white people are going to support a black guy."

So calling the American people a bunch of inbred racists from "Deliverance" is supposed to win votes?

• Pretends that McCain's history of flip flops, conflicts of interests, and temper, do not exist, "John McCain is a known quantity."

That McCain is a lie! Why do fuckheads like you didn't pretend that he isn't a stupid, corrupt, lightweight.  Talk about the real John McCain.

• Argues for divided government: "The country's still pretty divided ... people may want a divided government."

Gaaaa!!!!  What the fuck is wrong with you?  I'm speechless....could you help me out in the comments?

Well, was in my inbox, and I thought that we should have a relaxing Sunday Photoshop thread.

This one has political content:

And this one doesn’t, at least not overtly:

So, how about some "Photoshop Phun™" from Kossaks?

LOLCats, LOLDogs, LOLParamecium, LOLAnything heartily encouraged.

I go out to work on Monday morning
Tuesday I go off to honeymoon
Ill be back again before its time for sunnydown
Ill be LOLing on a Sunday afternoon
Bicycling on every Wednesday evening
Thursday I go waltzing to the zoo
I come from London town
I’m just an ordinary guy
Fridays I go painting in the Louvre
I’m bound to be proposing on a Saturday night
There he goes again
Ill be LOLing on a Sunday LOLing on a Sunday
LOLing on a Sunday afternoon

This ain't much of a diary.

Hell, none of my diaries are much of a diary.

What I am saying here, in a reference to the movie directed by Stanley Kubrik is that we need to express our solidarity with John Edwards' vision, that of the two Americas that need to be one America.

I'm saying that what is important is that increasingly the poor are falling behind, and the middle class are entering into what can only be called debt slavery, and that this message must not be forgotten.

U.S. convicts bin Laden's driver at Guantanamo

They were deliberating for what, 8 hours?

I've been following the case, and it appears to me that it was a fucking Kangaroo court.

Acquittals:

The charges he was cleared of on Wednesday -- two counts of conspiring with al Qaeda to attack civilians, destroy property, commit murder in violation of the laws of war -- were the only charges against him in the first prosecution attempt

Convictions:

Hamdan was convicted on Wednesday of five counts of providing material support for terrorism, specifically that his personal services to al Qaeda included driving and acting as a bodyguard for a man he knew to be the leader of an international terrorist organizatio

They convicted him basically for being bin Laden's driver.  What a travesty.

I want my country back.

[on edit]
This Matt Bors cartoon says it all:

Link to cartoonists page

There is an old joke about a Republican and a Democrat:

The Democrat says that when he goes to a restaurant, he compliments the chef, and the waiter, and leaves a large tip, and when he leaves, he says, "vote Democrat."
The can says that when he goes to a restaurant, he complains to the chef, curses the waiter the waiter, threatens to call county health, and leaves no tip, and when he leaves, he says, "vote Democrat."

Well, for those of us with poor people skills, cultivate your obnoxious side, and get a McCain 2008 button!!!

Keep it in your pocket, and when you feel like teeing off on some poor waiter, or store clerk, or whoever, you put on the button, and make tire gauge jokes.

Obnoxious people need to contribute to the campaign.

Courtesy of, qu'elle surprise, the Wall Street Journal, specifically Amy Chozick.

She is asking the burning question, "is Barack Obama too thin to be president?"

But in a nation in which 66% of the voting-age population is overweight and 32% is obese, could Sen. Obama's skinniness be a liability? Despite his visits to waffle houses, ice-cream parlors and greasy-spoon diners around the country, his slim physique just might have some Americans wondering whether he is truly like them.

First it makes me want to:

Then it makes me want to:

Then I want to:

Please note the question mark.

My question is whether an effort should be made to replace Nancy Pelosi as speaker of the house, not whether there should be an effort to replace her in her seat in San Francisco.  

With all due respect to the efforts of Cindy Sheehan, I want to limit this discussion to the possible, however implausible.

That being said, the obvious question would be, "Who would replace her," and the phrase, "Speaker Hoyer" gives me the heaves.

Let's be clear, Hoyer would have the inside track on being her replacement, and after him, would probably be Emanuel (projectile vomit time).

So Nancy Pelosi is far better than her two most likely replacement, but they have not, probably because they have not had the opportunity, been out in front of taking Chimpeachment off the table.

I know that in ruling out impeachment, Pelosi has consciously decided to abdicate her constitutional duty, and this is a big deal, but given how bloody awful the alternatives are, is it worth it.

I gotta eat lunch now, but I'm feeling nauseous...Speaker Waxman...Well, that settles my stomach.

We have a report from Politico dot com that the Obama VP team is looking at Ann Veneman as a possible VP pic?

Ann Fucking Veneman?

Let's get this straight

The search committee, now led by Caroline Kennedy and Eric Holder, raised Veneman's name — among others — in discussions with members of Congress, said two Democrats familiar with the conversations.

What the fuck?

These morons are talking about putting this on the ticket:

• Former Bush administration official, so it makes it easier for McCain to separate himself from Mr 28%.
• Has a political base only in California, where you will win anyway.
• Was so unpopular with farmers that when she went out to give speeches, she was booed.
• She forbade farmers from testing their own herds for mad cow.
• She is an extreme supporter of trade deals, just like McCain.
• She took the side of agribusiness over the family farmer.
• She loves genetically modified crops.

Seriously, can we have a competent VP selection team that keeps their mouth shut?

I think that all of us here would agree that if the choice is between a faux Democrat "Blue Dog", and a real Democratic liberal, we want the latter.

We want to move the Overton Window to the left, both for the party and for the nation.

Well, I was reading the WaPo today, and they had a round-up of their twelve fucking part series on Chandra Levy, and a thought occurred to me:  Based on recent news, it appears much more likely that a politician caught up in sexual peccadillos is a sanctimonious conservative, whether it be toe tapping goodness (Larry Craig), diaper play (David Vitter), or just fucking a young staffer.

Further I've recalled statements from staffers and pages saying that upwards of 70% of congressmen screw around on the side.

Something that is clear from L'affaire Chandra is that when hit with stories of sexual impropriety, Blue Dogs go down.

Condit was as safe as a congressman could be in 2001, and he lost the primary, so we know that sexual scandal can take down a safe Blue Dog in the primary.

So, do we want to look at the private lives of the blue dogs for this sort of hypocrisy?

(more after fold)